Thursday, September 27

*clears throat*

More of me
Originally uploaded by La Beave.
I am still alive.
Very much so.
This place needs a bit of a dust I reckon.
It's lovely and quiet though. I wonder whether anyone is listening?

Thursday, September 6

Today's Topical Horoscope #2199

Positive changes in your financial situation may finally manifest today after
considerable time and effort. This could be money that you've earned yourself,
or it could be some kind of settlement or inheritance. Either way, dear Virgo,
it marks a turning point for you with regard to your income. You might be
inspired to strive for even higher goals, for continued prosperity, as you
aren't generally one to rest on your laurels. Onward and upward!

Well for the last year I have battled to get my council tax refunded, which kept happening in parts and over and over I'd ring and explain I was owed more. A year this has been going on. A bleeding year. Now they are contesting that while I was on income support and housing benefit with no CSA money coming in, nothing at all when I first moved up here In Jan '05 being a loan parent with three sprogs etc that I'm not allowed Council Tax benefit even though it was awarded at the time as per usual. Since also gaining Student Status, they decided I wasn't allowed the previous benefit award. Yes that's right. Apparently you can only have either Student Exception OR Loan Parent with no bleeding job benefits.
No cause no one is ever both huh. No parent living on the dole with kids would BOTHER to pick themselves up, make the most of themselves and try and improve their future families situation by going back to college as much as possible for as many courses as possible?
The superior adviser I just spoke to today for two hours managed to realise that that's where the difference in refund is falling. As illogical as it may be. And, because she doesn't deal with benefits, is referring it on further to yet another senior person somewhere or other to look over it all again.
In theory... since we have finally located the missing £78 they owe me... it should only be a matter of time, possibly yet one more extended and exhausting phone call, and someone with sense to acknowledge they need to overthrow the massive dependency on computer systems and bring on another Arts & Crafts Movement, thus changing the world for the better, organising and implementing a Socialist anarchy and ending poverty as we know it, including my refund of bloody £78.
I would say that was a higher goal well striven for huh?

I'm now off to comfort eat current buns. Look what the council have driven me to. I will get raised cholesterol and die five years before my time thanks to this furore.

Monday, September 3

Affirmation of Myself.

I shrink.
Certainly my voice is quieter, less heard.

I've the unerring feeling of disappearing, or fading.
I colour my hair to keep from becoming something normal that blends in, something that isn't looked through, or past. I look forward to direction next week. Some affirmation that I'm alive and kicking. That I've my own singular purpose as well as the million roles in motherhood.

My hands fly off the steering wheel
Can't recall getting here
If I could, I would reach behind
And turn my light on
My thoughts run off the beaten track
There's no light
How's the way back
Take the hand of God
And bite the fear
No more lingering